There were no screaming headlines in Variety, but in the old days we might have seen this:

"BOFFO HOSE JOB FOR 'SNIPER,' EASTWOOD SEETHES."

That's right: "American Sniper," a box-office lollapalooza, got boxed out of the Oscars Sunday evening, which seemed to feature a small-plates menu of films few people have actually seen.

eastwoodWhat should Clint Eastwood say? How should he react?

"I'm laughing all the way to the bank" seems too flip and supercilious-especially under the circumstances of the ongoing trial.

So what is the appropriate response?

I suggest that we offer Clint some professionally crafted responses that might help him and his publicist through this awkward time.

I’ll start off: "The Academy didn't like it, but the people did. I'll go with the people."

Yours?