So you think you’re a big time, big deal PR executive?

Well then, surely you must know how to write a news release.

I know. I know. The news release is dead, an anachronism, a reminder of a simpler time, before Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Meerkat, et. al. took over the social communication landscape.

But if you really do wish to be respected as a trusted PR professional by your management or clients, then you simply must demonstrate that you can write better than they can.

And the most understandable, practical, straightforward and ubiquitous mode of writing is still the “who, what, where, when, why and how” news release style.

So take the following test, identify the dozen errors in the copy and prove your PR professionalism.

Boffo Corporation

Contact: Garston “Gar” Klix

Release Date: Embargoed for release, May 1, 2015

Boffo Corp. Announces Leading Edge Digital Watch

Englewood, May 1, 2015 —Boffo Corp., the nation’s most creative watch maker announced they would begin marketing a cutting edge digital clock, capable of keeping more efficient and effective time for longer periods than any competing watch on the market.

The new watch, described by industry observers as “truly an amazing time piece,” was the result of 10 years of study in Boffo’s Englewood, NJ laboratory. It was market tested in Boffo’s manufacturing center in Englewood, CO and universally hailed by test subjects.

According to Boffo’s Angus McNulty, “This revolutionary watch will clearly pace the market, because it’s that unique,”

The new watch, which comes in two styles—a “Deep Sea” version for $57.70 and a “Sports Pro” for $645.80—will be available for purchase in December in retail stores and online in November exclusively at there website.

Did you spot the 10 errors?

Here they are:

1. No need for “Gar” in contact name. Reporter doesn’t care what they call you; she wants news.

2. “Embargoes” are no longer honored by net-oriented journalists, eager to be first with a scoop. Avoid them.

3. “Leading edge” in the headline is a taboo term that can’t be substantiated and could turn a reporter off.

4. Englewood dateline needs a state. Is it New Jersey, Colorado, California, where?

5. “Most creative watch maker?” Who says? Prove it. You can’t? Then get it out of there.

6. Boffo Corporation is an “it” not a “they.”

7. What does “more efficient and more effective time” mean? Define your terms.

8. Is it a “clock” or a “watch?” Make up your mind.

9. Who are the “industry observers?” Tell us or we’ll doubt you.

10. Again, which Englewood is it? And if I’m confused, then I ain’t writing no stinkin’ story.

11. Who is this “Angus McNulty” making this fatuous quote? Identify him. Provide his title.

12. Why the stunning difference in prices between the two styles? Tell us for goddsakes!

How’d ya’ do?

Grading Scale:

• Ten or more right, and you’re a budding PR star.

• Six to nine right, and you better study up if you want management to respect you.

• Less than six right, not even a Ph.D. in hashtagology could salvage your sorry behind.

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Fraser P. Seitel has been a communications consultant, author and teacher for 40 years. He may be reached directly at [email protected].